my thoughts feel limited. it's very weird feeling and i cant say i've ever had this happen before. well....maybe but i dont remember it that well. it feels like there is a plastic wall surronding my brain, it doesnt let thoughts out, just little glimpses of what could be thought in depth.
and the thoughts that i am allowed to think are not very good ones. i want to solve my problems and there seems to be only one solution. the final solution.
i'm tired of being me. i'm tired of knowing im not good enough. i'm tired of being depressed. i'm tired of living. i'm tired of thinking. i'm tired of thinking. i'm tired of thinking. i'm tired of thinking. I'M TIRED OF THINKING!!!!! ugh!
and here are the thoughts that are taking over
-the fact that i'm only 17 and that i am not good enough
-the possible solution to my problems
-my girlfriend is on my mind alot
-how much i suck at photography
-the fact that im failing at everything
I WHINE TOO FUCKING MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i dont know why i bother to type this. you dont want to read this shit. maybe you do, so you can make fun of me. maybe.....
oh well.
i have't hurt myself since 5/27/2009
and i dont really remember the reason why but im afraid of the possible reason why....
oh and i might not graduate next year. fuck my life.
1 comment:
I know this is creepy as hell, but the reason I stalk your stuff on the internet is because I absolutely love your photography. There is something incredibly powerful about the style of your photos and often the subject also.
Well, that's all I wanted to say. Um, good luck with...life, I guess.
Sorry if this creeps you out a lot, but I look at your flickr account practically daily and I'm not sure if it's weirder of me to do this without your knowledge or not, but here we go.
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